Whole30 Day 5 – Feeling My Past Bad Choices

Today is my Whole30 Day 5, and I am feeling my past bad choices today! Big Time! Because I didn’t read the book before starting (and didn’t know what to look for online for the what to expect information), I thought I had a virus. I woke up nauseous and all of the stuff that typically comes along with a stomach virus. YUCK! I missed work over this.

My cousin is reading the book It Starts With Food (while getting the link, I decided to go ahead and buy it for my iPad Kindle app–it was only $9.99, how silly that I didn’t do that before), and she had posted yesterday that she had the “carb flu,” and I honestly thought that she was just feeling the effects of being carbless, but I didn’t realize she was feeling some of this. She didn’t experience the severity of mine, but the website explains that the worse you were with your decisions before the program, the worse your (basically) detox experience will be. Ok, that makes sense. You don’t get a body like this without eating a whole-lotta-junk!

Now, I have completely read what to expect, and I can feel reassured by this feeling. It is an indication that I have made a GOOD decision for my body. It is showing me what a car running on junk gas is really like. A friend shared that analogy with me years ago, but it never really made sense until today. Well, that junk that the car had gotten so use to is running out, and my “car” is spitting, choking and running rough.

On a positive note, I can be reassured that once this is burned out of my system, the good fuel I am giving my body now should really be appreciated and run really well. Oh, I do hope that means a positive impact on my metabolism. I have already started my “cycle,” something I haven’t had in a long time–another impact of my bad eating that has led to infertility in the past. After just 4 days, I noticed the beginning, and by today, I was in full swing. Another “inconvenience” that I can actually feel is a good thing because it means my body is actually working right.

I feel like I can actually carry this feeling around with me (at least while I’m feeling bad, which will pass in a day or so), and wear it as a badge to prove to myself that I can endure discomfort for the betterment of my health and my body. I have always stayed away from anything that made me “uncomfortable” when trying to do something about my weight and health. Rereading that statement, I realize just how STUPID that was for me to do because I am COMPLETELY uncomfortable. That is like the BIGGEST case of self-fulfilling prophesy that I’ve ever seen. Well, it is what it is–THE PAST.

Here we go toward the future. JOIN ME? If you want to start your own Whole30 program, let me know. Buy that Kindle book. It’s totally worth it, but if you don’t, at least read the Whole30 Timeline. It will tell you what to expect now, AND if you scroll down to the bottom of page when you finish reading it, there will be a link to the next step. You can read ahead to see what you will do when this Whole30 is over.

Thanks for following my journey. I’m glad to be back. The house is shaping up, and I am working through some things in my mind that tend to keep me from taking some time for myself to do things like enjoy my blog and post for you. I am worth it, and I am taking the time for me. I encourage you to do the same for you!

Starting Whole30 July 6th

It’s time to get serious!

I’m Back…I’m Back…

No, I didn’t completely fall off the truck! Where have I been?? REN-O-VA-TION! Have any of you ever renovated your own house? You want to talk about a BLACK HOLE!! Fortunately, I am back, and after months of focusing on the wellness of my home, I can get back to focusing on the wellness of my body, mind, and spirit! I hope you’re ready to continue following me. 

Has anything major happened in your life while I’ve been out?

Rx & Cleaner Eating Compliant – 7 days

I have learned that treating my triggers as drugs is the best way for me to succeed in keeping them in check. Well, ok, maybe not like a drug because people who suffer from drug addiction should abstain completely for their overall health (and maybe I should treat food that way too…but you have to eat…just not chocolate).

So to explain, I have already been drinking only water. I have done so well with that. I am nearing 160 days of drinking water only. Even if I try to sip 100% apple juice, it is SO sweet, I can’t stand to drink it (100% juice and milk on occasion are ok because I don’t have problems with those). Well, I restarted my cleaner eating challenge. I have tried this several times and failed to stay compliant. Using the word compliant or non-compliance really helps me understand that I’m not sticking with something that I should be.

I’m not trying to element anything permanently. I am trying to learn to CONTROL the foods and behaviors that tend to present themselves. 1. I have a difficult time taking medication. I hate it. I don’t want to take it, but I need to take certain medications. This week, I was almost 100% compliant. I did miss one evening dose. So I am drinking water, taking my meds, and I have also started focusing on eating cleaner throughout the week. I have had 2 meals that we’re “clean,” but all others were. Most of my meals were in smaller portions than I am used to taking for myself, and once I ate too much (soup).

This is significant because while the soup itself wasn’t unhealthy, the corn chips that I ate with it were. I also made some homemade chocolate syrup to make chocolate milk with. One thing I think occurred with this though was moderation. I was able to use some chocolate to make chocolate milk. Not exactly what I should be consuming, but the smaller amount of chocolate really helped out. I was able to have a little chocolate without having a whole candy bar, or whatever.

I am going to continue working on eating cleaning. I feel better. I feel thinner and more in control of my life. Nothing will be perfect, but it will be different.

How to Survive Obesity: Identifying Triggers: Understanding How, Why & When They Impact You

This post will discuss in detail triggers and how, why, and when they impact you. I believe that most people suffer from some form of food trigger. Some triggers are stronger than others. Some people may only suffer from them during certain times of the year. There are even people who don’t suffer from food triggers, and instead, their triggers are human or situational. Those two will be discussed in separate posts because they are quite comprehensive and serious to break all by themselves.

So, let’s talk about food triggers. The best way for me to explain this is to share some of my triggers.

1. Chocolate — sometimes just sugar in general
2. Comfort foods
3. Large portion foods

This is a good place to start with me. Number 1. Chocolate. As a woman, it isn’t uncommon to suffer from a chocolate trigger, but my trigger can spin out of control. I think this trigger is the most powerful at this point in my life. (fortunately, I have dealt with many others and broke them) Sometimes, I can just HEAR the word, and it’s almost like I can smell it. Once I get to that point, it is best for me to get a small candy bar or piece of chocolate and eat it. If I don’t, I will literally eat, eat, and eat trying to kill that craving.

Triggers that have that degree of power over someone will need to be addressed, psychologically, to break the obsession with the item. There are a number of different ways to do that, but for me what was most helpful was only eating chocolate that didn’t contain high fructose corn syrup, which greatly eliminates most U.S. made chocolate. There is just something about sugar in that form that makes it addictive, but that’s another post worth of information.

Another way that I have broken my obsession with items is to keep a can of very strong, minty, breath spray with me at all times. Anytime a craving hits me, I take a couple of sprays, and nothing tastes good with that stuff, so the craving goes away. Eventually, the unhealthy connection is broken. It can easily come back though if you slip up and eat some, so beware.

How triggers impact us is simple. They distract us from our goal. We begin to reason, well this one time will be ok. I’ll reward myself for such good work. There’s nothing wrong with rewarding yourself with some form of your trigger, as long as it is the least powerful in strength. For example, let’s say that my most powerful trigger is chocolate candy, but I’m out of candy, so I eat chocolate pudding instead. Low fat, sugar free at that. I found that I really enjoy it. I can eat the pudding and be ok, but the candy bar will lead to a lot of other binge type eating. It’s like a really bad friend. The one that encourages you to break the law and have fun doing it.

Why do triggers impact us? Some triggers are literally engineered to impact us. Some companies actually hire scientists to tell them how to make their product so good that customers are almost guaranteed to buy it again. This isn’t your fault; however, you can’t use it as a crutch either. You have to take this information and be informed and realize that companies want your money, and they don’t care what condition you’re in as long as it doesn’t blow back on them. You have to decide, “hey, I’m not going to let anyone give me something that’s going to decrease my control over the item.” You have to identify those triggers and acknowledge, “these triggers, in short, make me sick, so I will not indulge in them.”

When is it that triggers impact us? Well, those strong ones can impact us with a quick image on a television screen, or in a narrative as someone is describing a famous meal or dessert. With social media like it is, it can trigger you anytime someone “pins” a unbelievable looking dish on Pinterest, FB and so on. They can impact us around the anniversary of a happy or sad event. Emotions play a huge role in the development of such connections, so we have to be quick to identify the trigger and distance ourselves from them. If social media is a problem, then remove those pages. If it’s a specific friend, then hide their posts from your newsfeed. I’ve had to do that before. Do whatever you need to in order to rid yourself from this obstacles.

One last suggestion, and this really worked well for me. Make a commitment to a specific number of calories and document them daily for whatever period of time you need to until you can do this without posting. If your commitment is 2,000 calories, then you can eat whatever you want, as long as you don’t go over 2,000 calories. When I realized how many calories these triggers were eating up, I started choosing healthier options–those that enabled me to eat larger quantities while satisfying my craving. This works extremely well for me.

I have broken A LOT of triggers. I still have some, and we never stop forming them. New ones have emerged. The plus is that I know what works for getting them under control and not letting them control me. Being mindful of what you’re eating, and only choosing foods that you deem “worth it” will help you form a much healthier set of foods in which to crave.

Take a look at your list and ask yourself, How, why and when do these foods bother me? This week, try a couple different things to bring them under your control. I’d be happy to talk to you about yours if you need someone to talk to. If you’d like to share things that work for you, I encourage you to comment to this post. Until our next article, be mindful and in control!

How to Survive Obesity: Identify Triggers

Well, the first of the year is here, and maybe you’ve set a weight loss goal. My goal for this blog is to continue where we left off last year, which is Identifying Triggers. We have covered How to Survive Obesity: Accept Need for Change (please read back through those posts if you haven’t already). So let’s get started. NOTE: If your triggers aren’t food related, list whatever they are.

I didn’t set a weight loss goal for a New Year’s resolution because it isn’t just something I work on at the beginning of the year. I have been working on this goal what feels like the better part of my adult life. Fortunately, the more I learn the more hope I have. I have identified my need for change and all of of the steps that come along with preparing for change. Now, we need to identify food triggers.

Food triggers can COMPLETELY derail your efforts. I’m not referring to an “opps, I gained 2 lbs because I ate a trigger food and got of track for a week.” I am talking about, “I gained 15 lbs because I ate a trigger food and got off track for 2 months.” We each have foods that are our our kryptonite. It is up to you to identify which ones are yours. It is IMPERATIVE that you identify which ones are yours.

To make a truly honest list, think back to all of those times that you fell off the wagon. What was it that caused your fall? It may be a food category like CARBS, or it may be very specific, Mac/Cheese. Be honest with yourself and try to identify as many as possible.

Next week, we will review our food triggers. Use this week coming to make a list of foods that make you feel weak in the knees. Foods that make you eat more. Foods that make you feel guilty. Foods that you just shouldn’t eat at all because you get too far off of your plan for better health. Make the list, and we will categorize them next week.

See you stronger next week.

2013 Stats

Feel free to look over this and read the take aways at the bottom. But don’t miss the article before this one which is the first in the series of Identifying Triggers.

Date; Weight; Change; BMI
04/15/13; 316.8; 0.0; 58.0
04/29/13; 314.6; 2.2; 57.5
05/06/13; 313.1; 1.5; 57.3
05/13/13; 317.7; +4.6; 58.1
05/20/13; 316.1; 1.6; 57.8
05/27/13; 317.9; +1.8; 58.1
06/03/13; 319.4 +1.5; 58.4
06/10/13; 317.5; 2.0; 58.1
07/30/13; 328.3; +10.8; 60.0
08/05/13; 327.8; .5 59.9
08/12/13; 325.6; 2.2 59.5
08/19/13; 325.6; 0 59.5
08/21/13 Started drinking WATER ONLY
08/26/13; 327.6; +2.0 59.9
09/03/13; 327.6; 0 59.9
09/09/13; 328.9; +1.3 60.2
09/16/13; 328.7; .2 60.1
09/23/13; 330.0+?? +1.3 60.4
09/23/13; Cut out sugar except baking QA
09/24/13; 328.7 -1.3 60.1
09/25/13 Started Green Thickies B/L daily
09/30/13 328.7 0 60.1
10/07/13 325.8
10/14/13 329.2
10/21/13 324.5
10/28/13 323.0
11/04/13 326.5
11/11/13 326.3
11/18/13 321.4
11/25/13 319.9
12/02/13 319.7
12/09/13 325.2
12/16/13 324.5
12/24/13 323.0
12/30/13 323.0
2013 Take aways from 8/13-12/13
-drinking water only
-lost 21.8 lbs in 5 months
-gained 17.2 lbs in 5 months
-learned I am 21% better at losing weight
-gained mostly 1st & last weeks of month
-largest gains last quarter starting 10/14
4/13-7/13
-before starting water only, gains were
larger, more frequent, loss of 10 lbs,
gain 18.7 in 3 months
-was 47% better at gaining weight before
starting water only.

Post Thanksgiving Mini Success

Hi everyone! I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving season. This year my goal was to still lose 1 lb during this holiday season, and while I didn’t reach that goal, I am still celebrating that I didn’t GAIN, so far. I charted a .2 lb loss this week. Something I am very thankful for.

I did choose things I love instead of eating a lot of everything just because it’s there. When you eat food that someone else prepares, it is virtually impossible to calculate the calories unless they did that for you. Of course, no one did that on Thanksgiving. I just made my best guesses, and wow, it is really easy to go over 1500 calories. If you look at the caloric intake of a couple of the things you eat each day, you’ll realize what I mean.

So, here’s to still charting a loss of any size during a holiday season! Next week, my goal has been reset for a minimum of 1 lb. I’m taking on this week, and not looking back to the week passed. There’s nothing that can be done about time that has already passed. I can only do better from today and on. AND TAKE MY MEDICINE! I’m truly bad about staying on track with meds after having my baby. You go 9 months without taking anything, so it’s difficult to get back on track.

Let’s get our head back in the game. If you didn’t lose what you wanted, or maybe even you gained, don’t look back. Just start from today and shoot for 1 lb per week. This is a perfect time to start our Triggers series, since we’re going into the biggest trigger season of the year.

Keep following me, and if you’re knew or need the refresher, look back at the first series to get ready to jump into staying Trigger free.

Giving Thanks for a Successful Thanksgiving

I didn’t have to prepare much for Thanksgiving for my own family this year. We spent Thanksgiving with my grannie and extended family. I made lemon bars, fortunately, not a vice of mine. One bar was enough for me.

It was actually surviving the day without completely undoing any and all work I have been doing to lose weight that I am happy about. I am down 6.1 lbs for the past 2 weeks, and I am wanting to keep that momentum up. If you notice my little statement at the top left of my blog, you’ll see that when I started this journey, I weighed what…317? and then there’s a note increasing that number to a minimum of 330 because I didn’t really know what I weighed since Wii doesn’t go over 330. Apparently, it wasn’t much over because the next week I was back in business. I think that was the best experience EVER! It totally got my attention.

Well, my weight is almost back to that starting point. This week’s weigh in (that I need to update in the widget) was 319.9. Just 2.9 pounds, no make that 3 lbs because I want to be UNDER what I was when I started. If that takes 2 weeks, then that is fine, but it IS going to happen and I WILL keep going with losses EVERY WEEK there after. That is my goal! A minimum of 1 lb per week.

So, I went into this Thanksgiving with a strong mind. I would find my favorite things and stay away from triggers. I didn’t feel any “trigger” this year. Very nice! I didn’t overeat. I am very proud to say that. My calories probably went over my goal for the day just because I have no idea what my family puts in their food, but I was ok with going over this one day, as long as I ate good things and not all junk. I had string bean casserole (2 portions), dressing (2 portions), greens (they were very good), a little turkey, a taste of chicken and dumplings (which could have been a downfall but they weren’t seasoned the way I make them), and I ate about 1/2 of my plate and gave the rest to my husband. Oh yeah, a deviled egg mixture and one of my lemon bars (I stayed away from the coconut cake and the oreo cookie cake). Water to drink–in in the presence of 100% tea drinkers. (my #1 downfall in drinks–southern sweet tea!) A total victory!

Thanksgiving was 100 days of water only drinking. WOOHOO!!! And I can definitely tell a difference. I feel good. I’m not nearly as tired as I used to be. I actually even have a hard time going to sleep at night. I just need to put that energy to work. Well, I just wanted to share with you how things went yesterday. I hope your day was a victory for you, too. I am hoping for great news on Monday. I will try to report back then.

Shooting for 1 lb loss a week for a yearly loss of 52 lbs

I decided that all of the plans I had been trying weren’t working for me. I just needed to return to what I know works and that is counting calories. I strive for 1500 calories to shoot for 2 lbs a week, but be content with 1 lb per week.

The first week was an awesome win of 4.9 lbs.

This week was tougher because of some food choices I made, but I still won by logging a 1.5 lb loss this week. YAY!

Wow–it’s been a month! Getting Back on Track

Ok, so this will just be a short post (I know…I always say that, and it ends up being a novel!). Wow, my family got sick. It started with my baby, and then my husband got it. I swear I have been off track ever since! So now, I am sitting down and writing out some goals to get myself back on track. YOU are part of that list.

Ok, so the next series is going to be on Triggers. This time, I have decided to write at least once a week. I wrote every day during the last series, and I’m thinking that isn’t enough time to actually put into action what I am asking you to do. A week gives you time to read the post and actually put it into action.

One thing I would like for you to commit to as well is sharing this blog with others and interacting with me. I know you probably think, “well, someone else will do it.” The problem is that everyone thinks that, and no one interacts with me. Support is important for this type of journey, so if you’re following in support of my journey, then please post and “support me” with your comments. If you’re here to take this journey with me, then write and share your story with me and let’s do this together. This lets you support me and allows me to support you in return.

Ok, that’s it for this post. More to come this week on Identifying Triggers. See you soon!

Sickness Postpones Next Series

Hi everyone. I have sickness in my house. My baby was first, and now my husband. Please bear with me. I will be starting the next series which will be on Triggers. If you haven’t already completed last weeks challenges, read back through them and complete them. I will probably go to a 3 a week posting because I think I may have overwhelmed some of you with 1 per day. 🙂 I may have overwhelmed me, too.

We’ll see how it goes. Let me know what’s going on with you. COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT PLEASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSE.

How to Accept the Need for Change : Enlist Family Support

This is the last post on how to accept the need for change. In this post, we will cover the importance of enlisting family support. It is so important to have a strong support system when you are attempting to make such a huge change in your life.

Think about it. If you are morbidly obese, most likely, you have been overweight a great portion of your life. You became morbidly obese by not accepting the need for change, and NOW you have accepted that need for change, and your life will look much different than it does now.

Whenever a morbidly obese person begins to make changes in order to shed the years of unwanted weight that has been dragging them down, it isn’t something that is planned for 90 days. Power 90, while an awesome program and great if you’re going to use it back to back for multiple sets of 90 days, won’t help you reach your goal in 90 days (unless of course your goal was to workout 90 days in a row and to that I quote Tony Horton the creator of Power 90, “Press Play Every Day.”)

If you aren’t morbidly obese, perhaps you are the friend or family member of someone who is. Let me tell you that the measures you take to lose weight that work for you each time you need to shed the weight you’ve added on, won’t work (at least as fast) for your loved one. If I could say something to those family members who wish their loved one would lose weight, I would say, “Put on a fat suit for a month and live. See if you feel like changing anything except shedding the suit which you can do in a flash. Your loved one has to live in that suit.”

This IS NOT going to be an easy process. Your loved one is going to come face to face with so many realities about him/herself during this journey, and they are going to need you. There will be times they will want to hide under a rock, and there will be times they will want to dress up and be seen. YOU NEED TO BE THERE FOR BOTH! They need you!

They DO NOT need you to be judgmental. They DO NOT need you to tell them what they should or shouldn’t do. If you’ve never been there with the same set of issues, you don’t truly have a clue what they need to do anyway. You need to just be there to say, TOMORROW IS A NEW DAY. YOU GET TO START ALL OVER AGAIN!! DON’T LOOK BACK. ONLY LOOK FORWARD BECAUSE THE FUTURE IS ALL THAT MATTERS.

Be ready to help pick them up when they have worked out 6 days a week with Tony Horton doing Power 90, making HUGE changes in their food choices and don’t lose a significant amount of weight. They need to be reminded that there are changes being made inside the body that can’t be seen yet, but their hard work IS paying off. It takes a while to get over being abused.

I didn’t really intend to speak directly to the loved ones, but hey, if you don’t know how to address them about your need for their help, then give them the link to this article and let them read it. The work isn’t all for them though. You have to be strong enough to step up and say, “I need your support.”

On my birthday this year, I sat with my family and had a serious heart to heart. I told them, starting today, I will only drink water (excluding milk and occasional 100% juice). No sweet tea. No Diet Dr. Pepper. Not even Crystal Light additives to my water. They could have said, “ok here we go again,” but they didn’t. I was determined to succeed. I looked to my husband and said, “if I text you saying to bring me a drink home, you better bring home a large cup of ice and a bottle of water.” I went on to tell each of them, “I will likely contact you and BEG for you to bring me a Diet Dr. Pepper, but if I do, please bring me crushed ice.” (It’s what I have learned helps me get past the need for a soda. That and a really strong breath spray, which will kill your craving very fast.) I succeeded. He brings home large cups of crushed ice when he wants to be sweet and surprise me. I haven’t had anything except water since. It was a small battle toward winning a HUGE WAR. Drinking water makes me want to eat healthier. I’m sure there’s some physiological reason for that.

So, today’s homework. Who is your support system? Make your calls or better yet, call a meeting and talk to them all at once. Let them know that you may likely fall on your face several times throughout this process, after all it will likely take a long time to get to the point you want to be (that’s ok–the time is going to pass anyway, so why not be working toward what you want to be.) Be sure you let them know your weaknesses, and how they can help you. Remind them that you don’t need them to make healthy choices for you by changing everything around you, BUT they don’t need to sabotage you with making things they know are triggers for you (so be sure to discuss your triggers–we will be covering Triggers next week).

I know you can do it. We can make this journey a successful one. Just remember, it’s only the future that matters. Who cares what you DID? Look at what you are yet to do. THAT is what is of importance. I, too, am here as support for you. Comment and share with me what your plan is. I look forward to being a part of your journey and having you be a part of mine.

This is the end of “How to Survive Morbid Obesity: Accept the Need for Change” the 1st portion of the series “How to Survive Morbid Obesity.” Next in the series, “How to Survive Morbid Obesity: Identify Triggers.”

 

 

How to Accept the Need for Change : Eliminate Obstacles

Well after the day I have had today (it’s still officially Sunday at this moment, but will be Monday by the time this article posts), I can definitely talk about obstacles. I have a sick 15 month old. There’s nothing that can throw you off your routine that a child who is sick, especially when they are so small.

This is an ideal time to mention that this article is on how to accept the need for change: eliminate obstacles, but an even better time to caution that not all of lives obstacles can OR SHOULD be eliminated. Obviously, I would never want to eliminate my child’s need for me when he isn’t feeling well. I can, however, attempt to stay on track (even if it means writing my blog post at midnight (and no lie, the clock JUST turned midnight as I typed that statement…cool!) This article is officially Sunday’s post, so you’ll be seeing two (2) posts today, so don’t miss it. Actually, I just realized that I overlooked an earlier post, so I’m actually a day ahead in my posting. You didn’t miss anything though because I can see how I overlooked it. I wrote all about lifestyle and sickness in one article. Oops. Next week, there will be a post per day.

Lord knows that if you could look back at my life as daily blog posts, you would see excuse after excuse of why I haven’t succeeded in my pursuit for improved health. For me, excuses are my main obstacle. I can come up with some good ones, too. It’s strange how I don’t even try to have an excuse, but one will come to my mind quickly. Now, it isn’t uncommon for me to stop myself mid-excuse and say something like, “no, really I have no excuse. Truth be known, I was being lazy this week and not focusing on what I should.” THAT is being honest with yourself and others. If you aren’t going to be honest with others, at least be honest with yourself. Eventually, the other will show through.

Do you know what your obstacles are? Look over your day yesterday. Why didn’t you do what you should have done? My answers would include things like because I was watching television, or because I decided to take a mid-day shopping trip after going out to eat with some friends. There is always something else that you can be doing. Blocking off an hour of time to focus on improving your health each day is the absolute least you can do for yourself and your family. This isn’t just for you, remember. It’s for them, too. They want to keep you around (we hope).

After you identify those obstacles, develop a driving path. It’s just like Google maps. You put in two destinations, and according to what you want to avoid, highways or small towns, your driving plan is developed for you. You need to do the same thing for yourself. How can you navigate your day around those obstacles? The better you get at planning for that drive, the faster it will become second nature to you.

So, your homework is to list your obstacles, and make a driving plan that navigates you around them to your desired location. This really does get easier and easier as you do it.

All my best to you!

How to Accept Need for Change : Create a Written Plan & Post It

When considering how to accept the need for change, creating a written plan is very important for success. It isn’t just having a goal. I think we are all very good at setting a goal like “I want to lose weight,” but that isn’t an effective goal. It’s too broad, vague, and leaves too much wiggle room.

For example, if I set the goal “I want to lose weight,” my outcomes (measurable results of the goal) would be very difficult to measure. What do I measure? For starters, weight, but what else other than weight? According to my goal, there is nothing else to measure, so what happens? We are permitted to continue on and on in our pursuit, and in five (5) years we are still “wanting to lose weight,” yet are at the same place we were when we started. If you want to see a perfect example of an ineffective goal, look at my weight loss widget. Even though I am the queen of goal setting, I obviously wasn’t all that serious about losing yet because you’ll see how my weight ping pongs along.

So how do we fix that? How do we create an effective goal? We need to answer the basic questions that we ask about anything we want to know about.

Who: me (you)

What: Lose weight (broad); Lose 2 lbs a week (short term/ongoing); Lose 5 lbs (short term); Lose 150 lbs (long term)

When: Before a special event (broad); For each Weight Watchers meeting (short term/ongoing); within 3 weeks (short term); with 2 years (long term)

Why: This needs to be specific. To fit into a new outfit for a special event is one way to be specific, but that’s not the “important” point. For those who have a lot to lose like I do, this is going to be a “journey.” It is really easy to forget the “why,” if you aren’t specific enough. My reason is to add as many years to my life as I can to LIVE and THRIVE with my husband and newest addition to my family, my son who is just 15 months old now. For some people, it may not be as worrisome to think of the future, but for someone who is morbidly obese and 41 years old, it is VERY worrisome because of the medical conditions that I can add or worsen by not considering it very serious! While my “Why” is somewhat specific, it isn’t specific enough. I need to add something that can actually be measured. A blood work panel and doctor’s suggestion of ideal weight FOR ME will work.

Where: In this particular case, it will be a goal that will be active no matter where you are (including at your favorite restaurant, so don’t forget that). There are no “free zones.”

How: This will vary according to your body type, medical condition, and amount of weight to lose. This would be a great time to go for a check up with your doctor. Tell them in advance it is to discuss a weight loss plan and ask them to schedule you a full blood panel before your appointment, so you can discuss which plan would be best considering your numbers. P.S. Ask for a copy of it. There’s a lot to be learned from this document.

So we just finished the planning phase. Now, we will use that information to create our goal statement:

241Lady is going to set a short term/ongoing goal (which is easiest to make adjustments to as needed) of losing a minimum of 1 lb per week (52 lbs/yr), effective immediately with 2 meals a week being “cheat” meals until I reach a weight my doctor and I agrees to be healthy (I’ll fill this in after my appointment), and definitely not until I have reduced my need for any prescriptions currently being used for conditions that are related to obesity such as chronic fatigue, thyroid dysfunction (at least lowering it as far as possible), diabetes (same here), etc., for the purpose of improving health in hopes of lengthening life span to experience my son grow up and start a family of his own (and to meet my grandchildren). This plan is effective everywhere I go (vacations included), following a low glycemic eating plan and incorporating increasingly challenging exercise to improve cardio and respiratory endurance.

Now this statement could be posted as is, but it’s a little difficult to see the important points. Be creative in how to correct that (or just a basic list):

Who: 241Lady

What: Lose min 1 lb/week

When: Effective immediately until Doctor agrees to end

Why: Extend life expectancy and enjoy life with son/family

Where: Everywhere, even vacations

How: low glycemic diet, eating 5-6 very small meals a day, with 2 cheat meals a week, exercise for purpose of cardio/respiratory strength and endurance

When you get your plan written out and rendered down to brief, yet concise, statements, print it out and post it where you can see it. Make yourself view it by setting an alarm on your phone and maybe put dates and checkmarks to show when you read it. This is just to constantly remind you of your goal. You’ll want to do this at least once per week.

Another reason for posting it and requiring a weekly reading is for adjustments. You may find that your plan isn’t working and you need to change something. You’ll want to give yourself a good month to get everything going before making any big changes, but after that time has passed, if there hasn’t been some changes in what you see and feel, then you need to tweak a few things. Those tweaks may not change your written plan, but they will change the way that you accomplish it.

Ok, so that is the goal for the week. Write your plan and post it. I want to hear from you. You’ve been so quiet so far, and I know that you’re out there reading. Please comment if only to say, “I’m going to try this.” I would love to know that you’re out there. Hope to hear from you soon!!

Related articles

• How to Survive Morbid Obesity: An Introduction
• How to Survive Morbid Obesity: Step 1 Accept the Need for Change
• How to Accept the Need for Change : Get Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired
• How to Accept Need for Change : Recognizing the Link between Lifestyle and Health Condition

How to Accept Need for Change : Recognizing the Link between Lifestyle and Health Condition

How to accept the need for change includes being able to recognize that there IS a link between our chosen lifestyle and our current health condition. While lifestyle can include a vast number of things, for the purpose of this post it is defined as the way we eat and move.

For years (and I still do), I have asked the question, how does my body know how many calories I am eating? It’s not like a gas pump that knows how much gas has gone into the tank. There isn’t a dohickie thing that you can wear that counts the calories as they go in like a Pac-man game (if there was I would buy it). I felt like if I didn’t know how many calories were going in my body, then my body could be tricked into believing I hadn’t eaten as much as I had. I know better of course, but it’s just the way I FELT. My head understood the process, but my behavior didn’t.

As the years crept on, I would start hurting here and there. Oh, it’s just a sign of aging, I would think (except my mother doesn’t complain of it and she’s 20 years older than I…my grandmother may not even complain about the same things and she’s 40 years older that I am). Oh, well I slept wrong would explain the back woes, and I stayed up too late would explain my chronic fatigue (and I do stay up too long). I snap, crackle and pop more than Rice Crispies on a world tour, and why would I EVER think that it had anything to do with the way I eat. After all, my body doesn’t really know what I eat.

After LOTS of reading and research on how the body operates, and how it is able to determine the value of what we eat, even if it doesn’t know exactly what it is, I finally decided to be honest with myself. After all, kidding myself only hurts me. It doesn’t make the scale reflect any less. I don’t look any thinner to those around me. (I may be able to mind meld them to believe I am thinner. 😉 ) I can now say it, my body hurts me because I have hurt it CONTINUOUSLY over and over again. If someone continuously hurt you, wouldn’t you be in pain regularly? Even if you attempted to hide the abuse, your body would show signs of that abuse over the course of time.

Mine is.

I have treated my body so badly that I am hoping we haven’t reached the point of no return. Just as in human relationships, there is a point where pain will cause a split that can’t be repaired. Fortunately, our bodies are more resilient than our relationships. We can’t let the fear that we’ve gone to far stop us from trying. Just like human relationships that we beg and plead for forgiveness committed to never giving up, we have to be that way with our body.

A very wise friend of mine tells me over and over, “Give your body what it needs, and it will give you what you want.” I would just be like “yadee yadaa, yadee yadaa,” but she is so right! I have experienced a huge victory after only losing 5-7% of my body weight once (that’s not a lot of weight, but the victory was awesome!). I know that it is possible for the body to forgive.

So, can you make the connection between your lifestyle and your health condition? Can you go to your mirror (literally not figuratively) and say to yourself, I accept that I have hurt you…I accept that I have abused you…I want to change and do better for you…I realize that my eating and movement habits have caused you to hurt, and I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I want to care for you, protect you, and give you a chance to add many years of playing with the kids, sharing time with grandchildren, beating the guys at football, being comfortable in front of the mirror and those you love, and enjoying every day of your life.

If you can humble yourself enough to be honest with yourself (and eventually those around you as well), you will have a better chance at accepting the need for change enough to truly make a difference in your decisions.

You have your assignment. Should you choose to accept it, come back tomorrow and read the next step toward fulfilling the acceptance needed to move on.

Hope to see you here.

How to Accept the Need for Change : Get Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired

So How to Accept the Need for Change, there are actually several steps that can help you accept the need for change. Today, I will cover the need to get sick and tired of being sick and tired.

If you are morbidly obese, don’t kid yourself or anyone else. We all know (and I know personally because I am there), you’re not feeling well. I’ll speak of me, and you evaluate your own self and honestly accept what you find.

Over the years, I have gained about 5 pounds a year. That isn’t a lot you think, but it is. Multiply 5 by 10 and you get 50 pounds. But wait, I’ve been out of school for over 20 years, so let’s go with 20, ahhh, 100 pounds. It’s been slow. Creeping 5 pounds at a time. Each year I think, well I didn’t gain a lot, but I should be looking at the cumulative total, not just a one year total. Note, when I was in school, I was already probably 60 pounds over a “reasonable” weight. Add that to my 100 pounds, and yep, I’m right on track. Uhhh…to derail my life!

The body isn’t able to continue to take on weight indefinitely. It is resilient, and does adjust, but there comes a time when our organs, bones, joints, etc just have taken all they can take before they begin to say “ouch!” I feel like I say “ouch” a lot lately. Well, I have accepted that I am asking a lot of my body. Pick up a 100 pound weight. Imagine having to carry it around day in and day out.

On the flip side, imagine after carrying a 100 pound weight around for years actually putting it down. Think about it, seriously. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh. What a relief! I can only imagine THAT is what it would feel like. I want to feel that AHHHHHHH point again. I know that it isn’t as simple as just putting a weight down where you feel the relief at once, but the positive point is that you can feel the Ahhh even sooner.

According to the National Heart Lung and Blood Institute, losing just 5-10% of your weight over a six (6) month period can greatly reduce your risk of heart disease and a whole list of other diseases obesity contributes to over time. Of course we wouldn’t want to stop there because just think of what the second, third, and so on set of 5-10% of body weight loss could do over the course of time! AHHHHHH!!!

SO, are you sick and tired of being sick and tired? If so, read tomorrow for our next step toward surviving morbid obesity.

How to Survive Morbid Obesity: Step 1 Accept the Need for Change

After writing my first post on How to Survive Morbid Obesity, I wigged out a little bit. If you’ve been following my journey, then you know that I have been battling to lose weight for quite some time, but since August 5, 2013 (see the widget on the left menu) most recently I restarted my journey will a new commitment to succeed at any healthy cost.

I totally have Step 1 down pat. I know for a fact that for a very long time I have accepted the need for change. I KNOW that I NEED CHANGE! I have made changes in my life, but unfortunately, I haven’t found the proper combination for me.

If you are going to survive morbid obesity, you MUST be honest with yourself. I remember the days of avoiding the “F” word…FAT. I wasn’t fat. I was “healthy,” or at least that is what I told myself. My blood pressure was good. I didn’t have high cholesterol. My sugar was stellar. My doctor actually told me (around the weight of about 290-300 lbs), “I don’t know what is wrong. All of your numbers are good. I don’t know why you struggle to lose weight.” There were plenty of reasons why I wasn’t losing weight, and I don’t think her telling me what she did really helped me. In fact, I know it enabled me for a while.

Honesty. It is crucial to good health. Yes, being honest with others is good for your health too, but I’m talking about being honest with yourself. Denial is not your friend. If you can’t look in the mirror and say with sincerity, “you have gained WAY too much weight, and it is time to GET REAL,” then you haven’t truly accepted your need for change, and you are apt to continue to repeat the same struggles over and over again until you do.

Trust me! I know it’s hard. It’s a process. Owning your weight gain is your first step to recovery. It is your first step to survival! Begin working on the truth in your mind first. Think about what your diet consists of. Don’t pat yourself on the back so hard for that healthy breakfast that you completely overlook all of the unhealthy snacking that you do throughout the day and late night. When you were eating unhealthy things was there someone there forcing you to eat it? You made a choice right? Yeah.

Look, I’m not beating you up, and I don’t want you to beat yourself up. There is a difference in accepting responsibility and self abuse. Don’t self abuse. It is terribly destructive to goals! In a healthy way, accept that there are things that you could have changed that you didn’t or haven’t that have led you to a life of morbid obesity. Accept that the road is going to be long and hard, and the thin and fit people around you are not to blame. Accept that you may not be successful 100% the first several times you attempt to survive morbid obesity, but you keep trying again and again.

Hey, my journey is going to be a long one. I have bounced back and forth between awesome decisions and really terrible ones. You are not alone in your journey. I invite you to join me in mine. Having someone to talk to and be accountable to DOES help the process.

If you haven’t reached this first step, keep trying. This could be the beginning of a promising journey for you. I wish you the best of luck! The next step is coming soon.

How to Survive Morbid Obesity: An Introduction

How to survive morbid obesity? Written by a morbidly obese woman, interesting huh? Well, if there is someone who knows how to survive being morbidly obese, wouldn’t you expect the information to come from someone who has indeed survived living morbidly obese? Yeah. I think so.

Trust me, my advice isn’t going to be how to stay morbidly obese. There are things you can do to increase the chances that you won’t die from morbid obesity or the problems related to it. Yes, you read that right. I decided that I need to stop using the phrase, “live with morbid obesity” because in reality, the likelihood we will live grows less and less each day that we permit ourselves to be morbidly obese. SO, we want to make changes NOW that will ensure when we die that we aren’t morbidly obese. My hope is that ensuring that we die at a healthier weight will mean that we lived longer, happier, and healthier as well. Let’s get this picture right in our head. REALITY! Be sure the picture in your head is of reality. Be honest with yourself. It isn’t easy, but it is necessary.

So, it’s been a little quiet on the blog front, but that’s my fault. Maybe I should see if a couple of the ladies in our group would like to help write for this blog. It would definitely help. I’ll see what they have to say about that. Anyway, our group has grown and then decreased in size. We added two additional members, but I don’t think they were quite ready for our group. As a requirement of membership, active participation is a must. We share very private thoughts and fears, and it is really important for everyone to be equally as invested in such a program. We are back to four (4) members. These ladies are ready!

We have seen a little success in weight loss, and then have seen some ping pong back and forth 2 lb gain, 2 lb loss, or even staying the same. When you have over 100 lbs to lose, there are A LOT of behavior issues to deal with, and we are approaching those head on. It IS NOT an easy process. Much like any addiction, addiction to food for whatever reason (comfort, enjoyment, fear, anger, and a number of other reasons) can be paralyzing to a person’s life. If they feel that no matter what they do the result is the same, then they learn to be helpless. I’ve been there. I understand the difficulty! If it wasn’t for this group of ladies, today, I might have been there again. At the end of my rope, morbidly obese, and wanting to just give up on it all.

So what happened today? Even though I have been struggling since 08/05/2013 to lose weight, I have instead GAINED WEIGHT! I lost a little. Then my weight went up (which reminds me, I need to update my weight widget on the side menu). Today, however, was worse than any other time in the past. TODAY, my Wii was even more rude that usual. Yeah, it always tells me, YOU’RE REALLY FAT AND NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT (ok, well not in those terms, but it does tell me that–suggesting a healthy weight for me to be 119.5 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA). Well, today it told me that my weight had (IN RED FONT) exceeded Wii’s weight maximum which is 330 lbs. So, I don’t even know what I weigh now. I could weigh 330 or I could weigh a little more. I totally don’t understand how with the changes that I’ve been making, but I can be honest and say, my changes haven’t been severe enough because my food choices are still regular choices, although I am only drinking water (34 days straight so far approx 125 oz a day and no junk food, but I did allow ice cream–isn’t it in a class of it’s own? and I also allowed sweets that I make from scratch, which I did just once.

So here I am. I don’t know what I weigh. By next week, I will or someone will need to come help pull me off of the ceiling. So is this it? Is this the end of the rope for me? Is it my wits end? Yes, I do think so.

Read my next post to see what I plan to do about it.  This was an introduction to how to survive being morbidly obese. You will want to follow this series if you are morbidly obese (or perhaps you love someone who is and you want to help them).

Update Time Already??!!

Wow, this week just FLEW by!

Well, to update you on our group, we are now up to 5 people in our group. We have been making small changes in getting ready for a full-blown change in our life. You know, it’s not easy to go from eating whatever you want to having to think of how many calories, carbs, fat, or whatever you’re watching before you eat it.

Another thing that has been tangling some of us (ME) up is water consumption. I have NO idea why that continues to be a problem for me. I’m going to start a rule in my house, and hope that my husband is strong enough to make me stick to it. NO DRINKS THAT I LIKE!! While I think he shouldn’t be drinking them either, he is the one that has to make that decision before it will work for him. As for me, I say that he should buy only the drinks I dislike, and if I send a text saying, pick me up a drink on the way home, the response should be NO. I realize this will be hard for him, but if I have any other option in the house, I will absolutely NOT drink water! It’s sad, but I’m woman enough to admit it.

We have a GREAT milestone to celebrate already! One of our ladies has lost 10 lbs. Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Well, some of that is water weight.” You know what I say to you? It was just water weight on the scale, too but you don’t hear that when you’re standing on the scale. It’s “You’ve gained weight.” So, she’s lost weight. CORRECTION…10 POUNDS IS HISTORY!!! She has been doing so good on making changes in her eating habits and staying away from the pitfalls in her work place (where there are SO many temptations). The scale is rewarding you for your sacrifice.

We have a new rule in our group. We do not say that we lost weight because when you “lose” something, you generally want to “find” it. We aren’t wanting to find this weight. We want it to be just a page in the history book of our journey!

Congrats to KM! You’re an inspiration!

Strike a Pose. This Week’s Challenge.

People who have 100+ pounds to lose generally also have a great deal of emotional baggage that they are carrying around with them. As part of our program, our challenge this week is to “Strike a Pose,” and post a confident photo of ourselves to our secret group.

This challenge came about as a result of conversation about mirrors and feeling the need to hide from them. There are a couple of problems with not confronting the mirror. One problem is that we will ignore the fact that there is a weight problem needing to be controlled. According to a person’s body type, it is possible to gain nearly 20 lbs before your clothes force you to deal with the problem.

Secondly, avoiding a mirror can make you become disconnected with yourself. Before you know it, other people have seen you more than YOU have seen you. You begin to feel ashamed, lonely, and a number of negative adjectives. It is important to remain connected with the strong, confident you who is a beautiful person. Once you begin feeling as if you aren’t beautiful, weight becomes even more difficult to lose. It’s almost as if you feel like you don’t deserve anything good.

We are going to work on taking that confidence back. All of these ladies are awesome women. They each excel in their professional lives. They are caring and giving, and they deserve to feel confident. I don’t expect that because they will take time for themselves getting ready for a photo, snap a photo, and post it to our group that a brand new perspective will result. I realize this will be an ongoing process, but it is a very important step toward embracing the beautiful person that they each are.

Meal Plan Search Update

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I am lost when it comes to meal planning. I ran across a blog post that I saved a little while back. Apparently, this has been on my mind for a while! Yay!

I like how she specifies days like beef, pork, vegetarian, etc, and THEN she builds a meal around it. I think she even includes a day for left overs. Let’s see what we can learn from her.

The author of the blog post is Jenn from the blog Frugal Upstate. The blog article is entitled, “Why Should I Plan a Weekly Menu?” Keep in mind, this meal plan may not have a “healthy spin,” so you will need to use her ideas and make the recipes you add healthy ones.

What’s even more awesome, is that she posts her meal plans every Monday, Meal Plan Monday. Be sure to follow her blog, so you can see the new meal plans.

I hope you have great success in planning your meals. I am looking forward to starting one myself!

Week One Results of Weight Loss Group

As I promised, I am posting our results from this week. Now, keep in mind that this week wasn’t focused on making major changes. The biggest change (which is big enough all on it’s own) was getting our mind set and ready for this journey. We all had slips and falls along the way (and we will still have those from time to time), but everyone is onboard and feeling ready to take on another week one decision at a time.

This morning was weigh in, and our Week 1 weight loss (as a group) is

Getting Started Is the Hardest Part

Yes, getting started is the hardest part of any battle. Fortunately, I did not have to start this battle alone. My journey of one has now turned into a journey of four. We are the Fantastic Four! I am leading the group, leading helps me dig in and be totally focused because I know they are counting on me (find what works for you), and we have been using this week to get used to documenting our intake of food, drinking more water, getting our mind sharp and ready for battle, and identifying our food triggers.

We have set our schedule, and our weigh in day will be Monday mornings. We will be measuring two ways, 1-by scale (using the same scale, the same time of the day each time we weigh), and a snug fitting outfit. We will be documenting how that outfit FEELS on our body as we go. This is for those times when the scale may not show a decrease, but it’s obvious that there was a decrease. Some may use a measuring tape, but I just wanted to keep it simple. Not too much to have to keep up with.

The results so far this week have been good. I’ve seen several photos of meals taken at lunch or supper that were really great decisions. The goal of our plan is to try to make better decisions one at a time. We don’t want to over think anything. Just what is best for us and our body. We scheduled a cheat treat on Saturday this week and planned to eat light, no carbonated drinks and light salt on Sunday in preparation for weigh in.

We are hoping to have some good results. Because we all have at least 100 lbs to lose (each), I explained that no weight loss will not be seen as a negative. We will celebrate the loss of visceral fat from the inside and know that the scale will catch up eventually.

We are also tackling some nasty negative self-talk and emotional hangups. This will definitely be an ongoing battle. Fortunately, my BS is in Behavior Analysis, so I am prepared to help with plans to work through these obstacles.

We really appreciate your support, and hope you will be there for us tomorrow when we post our results. It’s a very vulnerable time, and we really need to know that we have the support of those who may be inspired by our journey. Please leave us comments to let us know you are reading and wishing the best for us.

Meal Planning? What’s that?

A member of Our Weight Loss Journey group has brought up a very important topic in our support group. Meal Planning. I have to say that this is not a topic I have covered much. I will have to do some research to see if there is a meal plan system out there that will work for me. I am the type of person who is a bit A.D.D., so my attention is easily taken off of what I should be doing and is on to something else.  I may start really strong on planning, and a couple of months later I have stopped doing it somewhere along the way and have completely forgotten that I was even supposed to be planning my meals.

So I am going to our readers. Maybe some of you do meal planning for your family. Do any of you have a plan that really works for you that you can share with us? If so, I would love for you to be a guest writer for me on that topic. The way you’ll do that is to write an article complete with links to the appropriate places, and then contact me that you have the article ready. You can email it to me, and I will post it here for you. If you have a blog of your own, you can actually write on your blog, and I can reblog you here, whichever works for you will be fine.

I don’t mind accepting when I need help. The question now is, who of you will help us?

Critical Fat Facts! What the Fat MUST Know About FAT!

Not staying on your eating plan can be detrimental to your weight loss and health, too. Notice I called it an eating plan not a diet. The ladies (yes, plural because we’ve picked up another lady and we’re happy to accept more) that are joining me want to lose a significant amount of weight also. There’s something I want to share with them, AND YOU as we get started.

If you have less than about 10 lbs to lose, completely erase the word DIET from your vocabulary, at least as it pertains to a short duration of behavior change that will result in the desired amount of weight loss you need to be at your ideal weight. Now, I’m not trying to rain on anyone’s parade, and this doesn’t mean that there isn’t a cheat day in our future–there will be 1 trigger free cheat day per week once we get this train going; however, the short diet I just defined will should NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER be a part of a person’s life after they have gained approx. 10 lbs over their ideal weight. For some, that’s high school. For me, that was junior high. Worst yet for the generation coming up now, that’s even elementary school.

Once your body has created fat cells, they never go away unless you have liposuction done (the consequences of lipo will have to be covered in a new post). You can lose weight, yes, and they call that “losing fat,” but in reality, you’re not losing fat. They should call it, “shrinking fat.” The fat cells are emptied of the energy substance that is inside taking up less space and making you appear smaller. You are smaller. This takes nothing away from the weight loss you have achieved. It does, however, mean that you absolutely can NOT have the attitude that you can just diet for 30 days and go off of your diet (like people do who only have small amounts of weight to lose–YOU AREN’T ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE, SO STOP EVEN CONSIDERING THOSE PLANS).

It will be more critical for someone with larger amounts of weight to lose to always stay on their eating plan. Those empty fat cells can quickly be refilled (and once full the creation of new fat cells occur) defeating the entire purpose of a weight loss program, increasing your frustration, increasing your sense of hopelessness, and increasing the chance that you will stay sick, tired, and die sooner than you should.

I’m sorry to be the messenger of bad news. I have almost 200 lbs to lose, so I can tell you that the journey seems very long for me, too. I completely understand how you feel after reading this, but we CAN be successful if we stick to our plan. Once I learned more about fat and have a better understanding about how it works, I can now see that I can’t compare myself to the skinny mini who gained 10 lbs over the course of the year and needs to lose it. The way to go about losing that 10 lbs will be totally different for her than it will be for me! REALITY CHECK!!!

Once we reach our goal, we will be able to develop a maintenance plan that includes foods we love while still ensuring we are eating healthy and not filling any of those emptied fat cells by weighing every single week–addressing ANY weight gained IMMEDIATELY!

SO…don’t feel all blue! I know. It stinks! I wish I had addressed the weight gain immediately once I gained it, or at the very least, at the end of the year when I had a checkup and the doctor said, oh…you’ve gained 5 lbs this year. I should have been like, BAM–LOST IT in a couple of months! We didn’t, so we have to do it now. Join us. We’re on this journey. We’re going to make it by sticking together, sharing ideas, recipes, exercise plan, etc. Having a support group is critical to the success of your weight loss plan, so be sure if you don’t join us, that you will join someone.

Life Changing Decisions. Join Us?

As I reported in my last post, I have met a friend online who has a goal of losing somewhere around 130 lbs. She found me in a group on FB. I was looking for a mentor who might be able to follow me through a program, but instead, she offered to join me in my journey to lose nearly 200 lbs. I never turn down an opportunity to have a friend join me on a journey.

Instead of needing a mentor, it seems I’m doing really well taking the lead. I am helping her get ready for making life changing decisions. To start we are going to:

1. Weigh first thing on Mondays before doing anything else.

2. Eat breakfast and post our meal in LoseIt.

3. Begin eating 5-6 very small meals a day, eating low glycemic as much as possible.

4. Make better choices each time we make decisions about food.

5. Increase intake of water and post in LoseIt.

NOTE: If you have a problem with cravings in the beginning, eat some peppermint or use some really strong mint breath spray every time you feel a craving coming on. It always kills my cravings. Breath spray would be really easy to carry around in your pocket.

We will do this for 1 week before really looking at restricting food. It’s just getting us ready. Getting rid of cravings, and hopefully, we’ll be feeling a lot better and ready to take on even more for the next week.

We are starting this journey together, but we need not be alone. If you are interested in joining us for this journey, you see the steps we’re taking first. You will need to leave a comment telling me that you want to join us, so I can get your online contact information, so we can get your plan written out.

Fat is INTRIGUING? Then I’m Fascinating!!!

When I do research online, I am very careful to use reliable resources. While there are a lot of people (even those like me who have done a lot of personal research) who know a lot about various subjects, when it is really important to know the facts, I always look for those who have dedicated their lives to the subject. They will know far more than Aunt Irene who reads every diet book that comes out.

I want to UNDERSTAND fat! Every relationship needs understanding. I obviously have a longstanding relationship with fat, so I believe it is time for me to understand it. I searched “the truth about fat,” and found great information from WebMD. A reliable source for all things health.

Apparently, fat is “intriguing.” According to this quote, “…for scientists, fat is intriguing — and becoming more so every day. ‘Fat is one of the most fascinating organs out there,'” says Aaron Cypess, MD, PhD, an instructor of medicine at Harvard Medical School and a research associate at the Joslin Diabetes Center in Boston. “We are only now beginning to understand fat.” OH GREAT! They are NOW BEGINNING to understand it. Well, I can definitely see why the rest of us don’t really have a clue about it except that we don’t want it.

What Color Is Your Fat? Brown or White?

Read the article to get the full story, but in short, brown fat can be stimulated to burn white fat. What they know about brown fat is that babies have more brown fat, and it is to keep them warm. People who are lean have more brown fat than those who are overweight, but don’t get excited, there’s only about 2-3 ounces of it (although it can still be stimulated to burn white fat and they are doing more studies on how to stimulate it, and even possibly how to develop more of it in those who have more white fat.)

Something else they know about fat is that buttocks and thigh fat is better than belly fat, and it may even have some helpful benefits. Further study is taking place in this area. Something good to know about fat is “So when you lose weight, what kind or kinds of fat do you shed? ‘You’re losing white fat,’ Fried tells WebMD. ‘People tend to lose evenly all over.  The results change a bit, however, if you add workouts to your calorie reduction,’ she says. ‘If you exercise plus diet you will tend to lose slightly more visceral fat from your belly.”‘

So, the skinny on this article is for those like me with lots of white fat, we should not only be eating better but also exercising because it does burn more, albeit slightly more, visceral fat from our belly. I’ll take that.

Now to use what I have learned!!!

 

Big Gain/Short Time Frame

I know I haven’t eaten the best during this period of time, but I wasn’t eating recklessly either. I can’t really tell a difference between the way I was eating this past month and a half, and the way I was eating before I started this blog. Actually, I think there is a difference, and that’s that I am cooking more at home, AND I am eating better overall. So, why the big weight gain?

There are a couple of other differences:

1. I was eating sugar daily.

2. I got off track taking my Thyroid/Sugar medicine.

So, I am going to get back on track with my medicine, and I am limiting my sugar. Limiting sugar in my diet helps me transition back into eating Low Glycemic, which does work for me.

GOING DOWN??

Challenge Bombed & Now, I’m Off Track

The challenge was supposed to have at least one other competitor, which was fine with me, but then after I worked out really hard (for Wii Fit) the first day, she wrote me at the end of the day to tell me she wouldn’t be able to participate. I was very disappointed. I don’t know why I put myself in such positions anyway. I really felt like there would be someone else who would enjoy some fun competition.

So here I am, well over a month since my last post. I haven’t been weighing on Mondays. To be completely honest, I just forgot all about weighing and even posting here. I was sick for a couple of weeks and had bronchitis. It’s like I lost my place. So I’m back. Trying to get back on track. I believe I have found an accountability partner, and I do hope it works out. I really need someone who is going through what I am and can be there for me as I am here for her.

Sad news…I’ve gained to 327. I was really frustrated with that number, but here’s a news flash for those of you who don’t know, you can’t eat any old way and expect to lose weight! 🙂 I didn’t weigh this morning, but I’ll weigh in the morning to see if I’m still at the same 327 from last week.

Time is so valuable. I hate that it is just passing me by, and I feel like I’m getting bigger and bigger. I’m still waiting for a fat donation program. There are still lots of people in this world who need fat, and I am totally willing to donate mine!! Let’s see if I can get myself back on track. Welcome to my new friend. I hope the best for us both.

BATTLE–IF YOU DARE!

Yes, a Wii Fit Plus battle it is! This started out as a quick idea, but it is quickly coming together in my mind. It is an awesome opportunity for anyone with Wii Fit Plus to spend untold minutes or hours attempting to beat the top performer’s score. There is a lot of potential for exercise, but because it is a competition, it will be fun. It’s not like you’re just doing to do it. It will be to prove you are the most determined on that day.

The way I am going to start this competition is to start out with the games. We will start out with Balance Games and Aerobics games. I will then add the Strength Training, Yoga, and Training Plus options.

The WINNER IS DETERMINED by their score. They will also post their calories burned as determined by the Wii Fit Plus piggy bank. This is just to show how effective our battle is. We will share how many combined calories we have burned. Here are the graphics you will find on my FB page. Of course you can join me there by following me on FB over on the left side of this page.

Projecting Goals, Not As Simple As It Seems

If you read my article where I realized I had only gained 5 lbs per year over the course of time (since high school–that’s a lot of weight), you will know that I had done a bit of analysis to see how that was possible. Well, let me be the first to tell you that my analysis was lacking. Apparently, I didn’t take into consideration times when I would eat whatever I wanted and would realize I was gaining weight because of how my clothes fit (or didn’t fit) me. This realization would prompt me to be more mindful, and I would get back on track. There is no way to quantify that. BOO! I like being able to see numbers and follow them down!

I guess I can use numbers by counting calories. If there is anything more boring than counting calories, I’d like for someone to tell me what it is. Grrr. Fortunately, I do use the Lose-It app on my iPhone, and it scans the label and automatically inputs the information. The problem is, I don’t eat a lot of prepackaged foods. I cook from scratch, and I’m using a lot of fresh produce, so there are no bar codes for those. grrr. Oh well.

As for having information to add for fitness, I have an idea for how to get me moving. I think I am going to sponsor a Wii Fit Plus event on my FB page. I know several of those I follow use the Wii Fit, so hopefully they will like the opportunity for a little competition. I have my fingers crossed!

No Meat — Not Enough To Lose

If anyone thinks that eating a vegetarian diet alone equates to weight loss, they are wrong, or at least on a short term scale they are wrong. I have not eaten meat (but eat fish and seafood; although not at the frequency of previously eating meat) since I posted here that I would stop eating it. I can’t even remember how long ago that has been now. It seems like it’s been at least a month.

I didn’t reach any of my goals set last week, so I will back off and just attempt one goal. WATER! My only goal this week is to drink my water allotment for the week. I have read that hunger is frequently a signal for lack of water consumption. The same for being tired, so my goal this week is to reach for my water bottle first before eating to satisfy hunger, and before taking a nap. Maybe that will help me reach my goal. I have done better, but I have not yet reached my goal on an consistent basis.

Not Brave Enough – Lost Anyway

Last week scared me. I started doing daily workouts, and when I weighed, I showed a significant increase in my weight. It totally messed up my goal to lose 1.73 pounds a week, and now, I am over 6 lbs behind on my schedule. Well, I’m not going to obsess about that. I want to be brave enough to start my working out again and not stop even if the scale does show an increase for a period of time.

I realize that water intake and retention has a lot to do with whether or not you lose, and I have been trying to work on drinking more water. This is a terribly weak area for me. It is not uncommon for me to go an entire day without drinking anything at all. It’s not really terribly uncommon for me to go a number of days with only a couple of cups of milk. I don’t completely understand the connection between muscles and water, but it seems that I remember there being a significant connection between the two. I need to read more about this connection, and I will share what I learn.

My goal this week is not going to be to lose weight. If I lose, then great, but my goal this week is completely focused on consuming water and restarting my daily Gorilla workouts. I have to be brave enough and trust that working out, eating well, and drinking adequate amounts of water will do the trick.

I have never really understood why I don’t drink a lot. I think most people would think that means I am drinking a lot of sodas or something, but no. In many of these cases, I’m not drinking anything at all. I’m sure that can’t be good for the body, so MY GOAL IS SET.

Is it a gain? Water retention? BOO

Well, today is my weigh-in, and I am disappointed and don’t even want to post my results. I had been feeling really good about my progress. Even my last post showed that I had started working out, and I have been sore but feeling the effects of working out.

I am not going to let this 4.6 lb weight gain on the scale mess me up. I don’t think there was a gain. I think I do have some water retention because I haven’t been drinking water like I should, AND I had several items in the past couple of days with high sodium. I remember Jillian Michaels on an episode of Biggest Loser once telling one of her contestants to stop using soy sauce because he continued to see gains on the scale. The next week, he dropped a considerable number. I am going to have to start cutting my salty sauces and add water consumption. Water has always been a hurdle for me.

Also, I am not sure if I have calculated my goal correctly for today. I may have to correct that. I started working out. I feel good, so I am not going to let the number get me down. I will let the number make me more aware of what I am eating to ensure I don’t have another week of gain.

Exercise Started. Feeling Stronger. Weigh-in Monday.

I have started my exercise. I am using the Gorilla app for iPhone, and I love it. You input the number of pushups you can do, and it determines the level you are on. I could do 15 pushups, so it put me on level 2. Let me tell you, these exercises are no walk in the park. I was sore after my very first day. I am still sore, but I feel stronger. I already feel like my core is tighter. My knee has been giving me a hard time from falling last month, but it doesn’t seem to be stopping me from working out. The negative at this point is form. I know my form on some of these exercises isn’t right, but I know that eventually I will get there.

So just one more day to weigh-in. I had sushi and ice cream this week. I’m wondering how that is going to impact me. Check back with me on Monday morning to see how my weigh-in goes.

Wait a Minute, What About Life Exercise?

You will want to read my last blog post to fully understand this blog post. The blog post is entitled, “Just 5 lb Gain a Year.”

I found that I should be able to lose approximately 94 lbs in a year if I cut back 602 calories a day and workout using a circuit training type workout for 30 minutes a day, every day. Then as the next day progressed, I realized I hadn’t worked out, but I had been physically busy all day long. This reminded me of the fact that there are a lot of things that we do every day that count as exercise. I do realize that this could be a dangerous way of thinking, so I want to add in a way to measure whether I did enough for the week.

As you know, I weigh weekly. This is my way of knowing that I am on track and the my weight is going down. I want to lose AT LEAST 1 lb per week, which would be a 52 lb weight loss in a year. I am definitely on track for that prize, but I would like to lose 90 pounds or close to it which will increase my weekly weight loss goal to 1.73 pounds a week. I will update the widget on my blog (over on the left margin at the bottom) that is keeping up with my weekly weight loss to include my weekly goal target. I am sure some weeks I will lose more and some weeks I will lose less, so this column will let me know that on average I am on target.

So…the measurement I referred to…that will be the weigh-in. When I weigh in, I need to be losing 1.73 lbs a week. If I do not lose that much, then I will need to make appropriate adjustments to my eating and exercise to increase the loss for the following week. Weighing in weekly will give me the opportunity to make those crucial adjustments to my plan. I feel good about it. I feel ready!! I have been eating some wonderful food, and what is great is that the majority of it is healthy food. The other great part is that some of it isn’t healthy food. I am enjoying it in moderation and still losing weight because of the work I am doing in other areas of my life. No need to go all food Nazi.

So what is your part in all of this? Keep reading. Keep “Liking” the posts, so I know you are reading or comment. I LOVE YOUR COMMENTS. It really does help me to know that people are checking out my progress. It makes me more aware. Thank you for the role you play in my weight loss plan.

Note: After updating my Widget, I see I am ahead of my goal!! But I don’t want to let that derail me by making me feel to confident, so I will continue as if I still need to work on reaching my goal. 🙂 I’m very excited!

Just 5 lb Gain a Year…

THIS IS A VERY COMPREHENSIVE POST. IT IS VERY INFORMATIVE AND COULD HELP YOU CREATE YOUR WEIGHT LOSS PLAN. YOU WILL MOST LIKELY NEED TO READ IT MORE THAN ONCE. DON’T JUST SKIM OVER IT AND MISS THE POINT. LEAVE YOUR QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS IF YOU NEED HELP DETERMINING YOUR PLAN.

I was talking to my mother-in-law about my son’s weight. He’s 9 months old and considered by his doctor to be “overweight for his height.” We had a discussion about just how ridiculous it is to start such a measurement so young! She agreed that he is in no way a “fat” baby. Yeah, he has a fat roll on each of his thighs, but other than that and a little bit of a fuller face, he is a lean little machine. I’m not worried, and I will NOT permit the negative programming that screwed up my head to be preached to him.

While we were talking, I mentioned to her that since marrying my husband, I had gained about 10 lbs a year. When I go back to my earliest recollection of my weight, which would be 198 lbs in 1991 a year out of high school, and compare it to my weight today on average I have gained just over 5 lbs. a year.

313.1 (today’s weight) – 198 (1991 weight) = 115.1 pounds gained over 22 years

115.1/22 = 5.23 lbs gained per year (on average)

Given there are 3500 calories in one pound, in order to gain 5.23 lbs in a year, I would have to have eaten…

5.23 lbs X 3500 calories = 18,305 calories overeaten over the course of one year. How hard is this to do? Let’s see what it equates to on a daily and weekly basis.

18,305/365 = 50 calories over each day or 1 sugar free snack cup of Apple sauce

18,305/52 =  352 calories over a week or 1 Tuna Melt Sandwich

WOW!! Somehow, I don’t feel like I am such a PIG now! I definitely see how this happened!!! Keep following me! You’ll see it, too, and you’ll see how I will keep from adding another pound to my numbers (even as I continue to lose weight).

Let’s flip this to exercise. I NEVER exercise. Why? Because you work your butt off for nearly nothing! Not to mention, IT’S BORING! I’m referring to the gym type of exercising of course.

According to Fit2Flex blog, you can burn 50 calories in 5 minutes doing 5 simple exercises for 1 minute each. See the link for those exercises. I think I can definitely give that amount, DAILY, to help offset what I tend to gain over the course of a year. Do you see that? If I hadn’t looked at exercise the way I had, I could have offset the amount of weight I was gaining.

The fitness industry wants to sell us all kinds of things, but in reality, what has been said by so many is true! If we exercise just 20 minutes a day 5 days a week, we should prevent weight gain for the year.

Losing weight is a different story! I think this is where we lose our way. I am almost positive this is where I lost my way. I have 22 years of 5.23 lbs to lose, so I can’t just do 20 minutes a day 5 days a week. I need to do that minimum to ensure I don’t continue to gain, yes, but to begin reversing the scale, I have to add more.

How about some math. My brain will hurt after all of this analysis…

Just using the numbers I have so far (which is based on my weight gain according to my metabolism…you’ll need to consider your numbers)…I am only taking into consideration exercise at this point. This will not take into consideration an improved way of eating. This is basically the same, mindless eating pattern that I had over the course of these 22 years.

According to my analysis, it would take me three (3) years to lose the 180 lbs I have gained over the course of 22 years plus the amount to reach normal BMI. In order to lose this weight, I will have to workout 1 hour every day for the next 3 years. Again, this is keeping with the same mindless eating pattern I was in before, which I will not do. I am improving my eating, so this number can actually be reduced. This is just the worst case scenario. This workout isn’t just a basic stroll either. This is the Fit2Flex workout…an hour long, so that is a relatively intense workout considering the duration.

Reducing my caloric intake will have an even greater impact on this goal. If reducing my caloric intake could do half of the work, then I could lose the weight in 1.5 years. It is a lot easier to cut 50 calories than it is to burn 50 calories. Cutting my mindless eating, caloric intake 602 calories a day and exercising 30 minutes a day, every day for 1.5 years…I should be able to reach my goal.

I will review my current eating to determine if I have decreased my caloric intake by eliminating all meat and eating fish/seafood only. I am hoping the changes in meat and dairy that I have made will be enough.

I know this blog post was a little more complicated because it wasn’t one that you could read without analysis. Look, if you want to lose weight, YOU HAVE TO THINK. You can’t just say, ok, I’ll workout and cut back. It’s just not enough to do that. You need to know how much you need to workout and how much you need to cut back. It will take a lot of thought and basic math to come up with your numbers. Take time out to determine your plan.

Ding, ding, Weigh-in Day

Today is weigh-in day.

I lost 1.5 lbs this week.

New BMI 57.3.

My new weight is 313.1.

My goal was to lose 2 lbs per week, so I have 2.4 lbs to lose for next week to be on goal. I am not going to obsess over that. I will continue doing what I am doing because apparently, I am doing something right.

What’s My Size?

I don’t know a woman in the world who truly knows what her size is. If you go to one store, it’s one number. If you go to another store, it’s a different number. Some people believe that clothes are labeled with a lower size because women will want to be in denial and purchase the dress just so they can say they wear a smaller size. Maybe we are part of the problem.

It is truly sad that some people will squeeze themselves into clothes too small and too tight, all so they can say that they are a smaller size, or because they refuse to go to a higher size. I guess I am one of those people. Now, I don’t wear clothes that are skin tight, but I have reached that point in my jeans where I have said, “I’M NOT GOING ANY FURTHER!” I thought I might have reached a point where, for comfort sake, I would go to a new size until I lose weight. This is the story of that venture.

I guess I was asking for it. I was shopping at Wal-Mart. Hey, there is nothing wrong with buying your clothes at Wal-Mart, especially when you’re trying to watch your finances. The two brands there are Lee and Just My Size (which is not my size). The jeans I am wearing now (grant it a CATO Plus brand, women will understand that, well worn, and a flexible denim fabric) are a size 24W. The jeans pull across my belly to the point the zipper needs some repair, and I have to wear a blouse long enough to cover the zipper because it just looks odd. I have tried jeans in that same size again, and they don’t fit. At Wal-Mart, I even went to a size 26W. The Lee brand was a definite loser. The Just My Size brand was at least one size too small. There were no 28W to try on (even typing that number freaks me out).

I put the jeans back and decided I would go back to CATO Plus on another day and try a larger size there. I have even considered waiting until I lose one size and can fit into the 26W before buying a new pair. Maybe I shouldn’t give in to the larger size at this point. The uncomfortable pants do remind me that I need to continue to be diligent on my journey. What do you think? Do you think I should use this as a motivator? Maybe I should make buying a new pair of jeans a reward when I can buy an appropriate fitting 24W.

Self contemplation: How have I let myself get here? What in the world was so interesting that my attention was off of myself long enough to get here? I will consider those questions for a future post.

Where Does Your Motivation Come From?

What motivates you to move? What makes you want to get out and do something different than what you typically do?

This post is going to be simple. I am searching for motivation. I am reminded of a segment of a movie that really sums up how I feel right now. “I want to want to” do more than I am doing in my life. I want to want to be more active in every way possible.

Where do I find help?

 

Always Thinking of Food, Ughhh

It seems that since I have determined in myself to lose this extra fat girl that I’ve been carrying around, food has been on my mind almost 24/7 (except when sleeping and even then I dream about food sometimes). Fortunately, this preoccupation with food has been in a good way.

I have been searching websites for recipes that are non-dairy/non-meat recipes. Because it closely resembles the Vegan way of eating, I have been searching Vegan recipes as well (although, I would not consider myself a Vegan–not even a vegetarian even though I will not be eating meat). I am not saying that I will never eat meat. My plan is to greatly reduce the amount of meat that I eat to nearly none (excluding fish/seafood), with an occasional meal including meat (my hope is to find locally raised meat with no history of abuse).

I’m not going all crazy on either point, but I am making strides in a direction that will improve the quality of food that comes into our home and into our body, while not contributing to the commercial misuse and abuse of animals. I know my family won’t change the world by abstaining from meat produced in such commercial businesses, but I will at least know that we aren’t contributing to such mistreatment.

I thought I would share with you a really COOL Vegan dish. Vegans don’t eat eggs, so creating a vegan “fried egg” was really interesting to me. Check this out! Really cool, and slightly scientific. Enjoy!

If you happen to have some favorite vegetarian or Vegan recipes you would like to share, PLEASE DO! I need all the help I can get. 🙂

Speaking of Kermit, My Ms. Piggy Nightmare

In yesterday’s Weigh-in article, I shared that when I was celebrating my weight loss I could hear Kermit in my head “YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.” If you have ever watched The Muppets, you heard the same sound when you read my quote. Funny how that works–word association.

Well, in thinking of Kermit, Miss Piggy came to mind. You can’t think of Kermit without Miss Piggy, so you see how the one led me to memories of the other. Well, in thinking of Miss Piggy, I am reminded of an occasion when I was bullied on my first job by my supervisor. A smile is cracking across my face right now because I know you are probably rereading the paragraph to be sure you didn’t miss something. Sad thing is, this isn’t a funny story. It was a nightmare.

NO, unfortunately I wasn’t dreaming. This is a real life nightmare. I have just turned 16 years old. I begged my parents to let me get a job. I was in Future Business Leaders of America at school, and my interests have always been in business. I was ready to have my first job. After much discussion, they finally agreed. New on the job and excited for my first opportunity, I start to work at Dairy Queen. My immediate supervisor, the night supervisor, had it in for me from the start. I have some ideas why she may not have liked me, but I won’t go there. I will just digress to say, it doesn’t matter. She was the supervisor and should have taken positive advantage of someone who was ready to work hard, instead of terrorizing me.

And terrorize me she did. Maybe it’s every person’s right of passage on their first job to be the “newbie” tortured to do whatever it is that you don’t want to do. I didn’t mind the work. It was the name calling that was so hurtful to me. There was this one particular night she was out to get me. I was convinced that she was trying to make me want to quit my job. I’m not sure why. I was always on time. I followed instructions. I didn’t talk back. Who knows?

It was raining out. I worked every night until close, which meant I didn’t get off work until 11 p.m. This particular day she would repeatedly refer to me as Miss Piggy. The only thing I can think is she said it the first time and saw pain on my face and thought, this will surely make her leave. I worked through the pain. By the end of my shift, I was nearly in tears. I went to my car and started home, crying.

I couldn’t get home fast enough that night. Between the rain and my tears, I wasn’t prepared for the water slick that was just up the road from my home. I turned onto the road, still crying, hit the slick, my car spun off the road and into a steep ditch, nose first. This was before cell phones. Still raining out, heartbroken, and nose first in a steep ditch, I get out of the car and struggle to push my car back out onto the road. I was REALLY CRYING by this point as you could imagine.

I got my car back on the road. Looking back now, I have no idea how, but I did. I went home, and I can’t remember for certain, but I am pretty sure if she was up, I would have confided in my mother. Yet, I’m not sure if I did because the woman still had a job the next day, so perhaps I didn’t. It’s funny how I don’t remember how I actually dealt with that. Maybe I didn’t. Maybe I just kept it in. Like I did the countless times I was verbally tortured on the school bus or at school.

I returned to work the next day. My resolve…untouched. What is it they say, “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger?” Yeah, I was stronger. Maybe she saw a look of determination on my face that caused her to never bully me again, or maybe, I didn’t care anymore and tuned her out. I have no memory of future instances of bullying from her. I am sure a person doesn’t just stop, so it’s probably the latter.

To help you feel a little better about the situation, although probably not total vindication, when I left that job I was accepted to work at the most sought after position in school working programs. It was a state position with our local Department of Family and Children Services. While there, I was privy to a lot of confidential information. I was in charge of setting up a new filing system in which I surprisingly ran across her file. I handled the opportunity with the same grace as the bullying–with integrity. I was later face-to-face with her when working reception at the same location. Imagine her face as she stepped up to, “Miss Piggy.” I can only imagine what went through her mind at that moment. Unfortunately, I will never know. Again, I handled the situation with grace–extending to her the grace I would want extended to me if I ever was in her position.

Fast forward 20 years and a master’s degree later. I am working as a social worker for a low-income housing project for disabled and elderly people. Someone close to her was being considered for residency. In reviewing the application, the whole experience ran through my mind again. At the time, it was just her name on paper, but later, she would be standing in front of my desk–just she and I face-to-face. WHAT AN OPPORTUNITY.

She looked at me and said, “You look familiar. I said, yes. You know me,” and I gave her my maiden name. I then said, “I’m sure I’ve changed a lot,” as at this point I weighed approximately 317 pounds, twice the person I was at 165 when she called me Miss Piggy. Oh the irony. She responded, “I have grown up a lot.” We had a moment of silence. I think we both knew what she meant.

While I was given several opportunities to return to her the wrongdoing she did to me, I did not. I am a bigger woman (pun intended), and PROUDLY SO. Maybe I wouldn’t have eaten my pain away if I had used some choice words and gotten myself fired that night. Life is full of pain. We deal with it in whatever way we can. I am looking forward to returning to that 165 pounds. Who knows, I may want a “do over”

Miss Piggy (Photo credit: Phillie Casablanca)

at that point. When I reach that point, maybe I’ll contact the owner and ask to volunteer as a mentor to the employees there as I bring my mad blizzard making skills back to the scene. Hey, that actually sounds like a fun idea. It’s the same owner. It could happen. 🙂

Thanks for reading my nightmare. Unfortunately, I didn’t wake up from it in a night sweat and thankful breath that it was only a dream. Do me a favor. Be kind to those who are larger than you are. As a matter of fact, be kind to others…period. You never know how that person could impact your life at a later time. I am proof that those opportunities do indeed happen, and in my case, more than once.

Ding, Ding…Weigh-in Day

There will be two posts today. This weight reveal and the earlier post. Please be sure to read it. It is a very informative post that could change your life. I believe it is going to change mine.

The exact weight that I started with was

316.8               BMI 58

After my Wii weigh-in this morning, my weight is

314.6               BMI 57.5

A LOSS OF 2.2 LBS! (I hear Kermit the Frog shouting “YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY”).

Since the creation of this blog, I have been gathering information. I have started making small changes. No big changes have been made yet. Just with the very small changes, I have lost 2.2 lbs. The changes made so far have been writing daily blog posts, following a group of those like me on FB who have 100+ pounds to lose, reading or watching lots of research on better eating, and that’s about it.

I would say that I have made changes in my eating, but really, I haven’t made any significant changes yet except to be more mindful of what I am eating. I will start this week making changes in that area.

Tick Tock…Weigh-in is a-comin’

I notice that my clock is reminding me to weigh-in when I get up in the morning. Pretty nice feature I think. It has kept my weigh-in on my mind, so I think it was definitely a nice widget to use for the blog. I write the night before, so by the time I weigh, this article will have already posted. There will be two articles tomorrow then, so keep your eyes peeled.

Ok, so this is what is going on here. I have been looking for resources on clean eating, and I ran across a documentary called “Forks not Knives.” It is on Netflix under documentary. If you don’t have Netflix, it may be on Amazon Prime. If all else fails, you can actually watch it on Amazon for $3.99. I’m not one to easily advocate for products, but this video is worth every penny and every minute. It is 1 hr 36 minutes long. Full of research that will excite you to make MAJOR changes in your eating. We are talking about scientific evidence, statistically significant, on how eating a non-meat, non-dairy diet will not only stop your disease progression, but in many cases such as heart disease (even hereditary forms) diabetes and cancer, REVERSES THE DISEASE AND DAMAGE! Totally incredible!! While it does include detailed support, it is in everyday lingo and an easy watch. You will not be sorry.

Since I have been on my own, I have been “the fat girl.” Always overweight for my height. Never losing weight–always gaining. Diabetes is in my family history, but according to this research (a hugely comprehensive study), I could avoid the disease. I can reverse some of my health issues such as my fatty liver. There is a woman on the film with diabetes who after 20 weeks of non-meat, non-dairy eating, lost 45 pounds and reduced her need for medication for diabetes and reduced her sugar to between 60-80 with no medication!

They explain how this way of eating will not only help your cholesterol numbers, but reverse the damage to the heart arteries caused by heart disease. There was actually a long term study on a group of people who have eaten this way for nearly 20 years now. Hugely successful in giving them back their life. An active life!!

Take a look at it. Let me know what you think about it. I had already been backing away from meat in my home, but after this documentary, once the meat in our freezer is gone (which won’t be long), we will be a meat & dairy free home. We will eat fish and seafood, but not meat and dairy. I feel excited and ready to see the changes. As a matter of fact, I think I am going to schedule an appointment with my doctor and request a full blood panel, so I can see the changes over the course of time.

 

Hungry for Change

To say I am hungry for change is an understatement. I have been hungry for change for a long time. Change isn’t always easy though, especially when it will mean changing behaviors that have become bad habits over the course of time.

Habits such as:

Not eating breakfast

Not drinking enough water (or not drinking much of anything)

Eating mindlessly

Not following a schedule for eating

Not planning meals which results in last minute fast food pickups

Not saying “No” enough

Thinking about exercise but never doing it.

Eating while watching television or while otherwise distracted (which causes mindless eating)

This is the type of thing that could potentially derail me. I see this list, and I know that each of these behaviors should be addressed. I am bad to attempt to tackle a number of them at once. I can’t do that. I need to push away from this article and look at the list targeting the one behavior that would have the greatest impact and work on it first.

In looking over the list, I think that meal planning would probably yield the greatest results. If I plan my meals, then I would most likely follow a schedule, eat breakfast, drink water, and not eat out. Is that cheating? Is that choosing one that impacts many and in impacting many will that be too much change at once? What do you think?

I watched a WONDERFUL video on Hulu.com (I think, or Netflix) called “Hungry for Change.” The video is about three overweight guys (some who you’ve seen in other videos like the guy who juiced for 90 days in Fat, Tired and Nearly Dead), who had each (through different means) taken control of their health without pills and gimmicks. They joined forces to gather research on becoming healthy without having to buy anything different than you would grocery shopping. THIS IS WHY I LOVED THIS FILM. They weren’t trying to sell you anything. No lapband infommercial. Although they discuss juicing, it wasn’t like a juicer commercial.

The moral of their film is to make changes slowly. Even in changing your eating. I loved what one of them said. He said something to the effect of, “Don’t go through your house and throw everything away and go buy up the store in healthy foods. Just start adding healthy foods to what you are eating now. When you go shopping again, start making healthier choices. Don’t try to do it all at once. Your body will begin to crave more and more change, and when it does, give it the healthy options that it’s craving.” It was THE MOST REASONABLE way to look at a healthy eating plan.

Today, I added sweet peppers as a snack and were they good!! I love sweet peppers. We had pizza today, but instead of our typical all the way, we choose an awesome veggie pizza with lots of peppers. It was SO DELICIOUS! Warning, they are a bit watery that way because of the water from the veggies, so they tend to be a little messier.

Are you hungry for change? Do you think you can start adding healthy items to your eating now to make changes slowly? I think it could work for me if I keep my mind on the prize.

Eating Clean? Really??

I have been hearing people talking about “eating clean.” I basically just let it go in one ear and out the other along with, eating for your blood type, eating for your personality, and living off of green juice.

I decided to read a little on the subject, for one–just defining what “eating clean” really means.  Below I am sharing an article on the subject. Basically, it’s eating foods in as close to their original state as possible, avoiding processed foods, and eating lots of fruits and vegetables. It sounds to me like someone just renamed “eating a balanced meal.” Maybe we needed the message repackaged and relabeled to get by all of the old objections we have to eating “right.”

I have decided to try to do this. I already do my shopping to avoid the processed stuff, so adding on for fruits and veggies shouldn’t be difficult. I love them! This will be one of the baby steps. One, step, at a time! Here’s to clean food.

Related articles

• What IS Clean Eating and How Do I Do It? (shareitfitness.com)

A Creepy Realization…

I told you in my first post that I am going to be very transparent in my posts, so let’s get personal!

There are certain things that I just cannot stand feeling. One of those things is when I have gained so much that a fat roll touches other fat! If you’re overweight and have these “rolls,” you know what I mean. There’s a crease in the skin and eventually the roll grows enough that it reaches beyond the crease to touch the skin above or below it. EWWWWWWWWWWW! I can’t stand it! I have to say that this could very well be why I am not any heavier than I am now. It could be one of the things that moves me to action.

As if that wasn’t creepy enough, I was taking a shower, and I have a creepy and heart-wrenching realization. Grant it my shower is narrow but that fact doesn’t help my mind. I started washing my hair and my arms touched each side of the shower. I do this thing…it’s a silly measurement thing. I stand in the shower with my hands next to me (open, thumb at my side and pinkies to the wall) to see how much room I have before they would touch each side. I was almost in tears with the realization that there is nearly no room left. If I continue to gain, my hands will touch each side.

As a fat person, I have all kinds of ways to measure myself against others. You may do some of these, too. When my husband is driving, I notice how far his belly is from the steering wheel, and when I drive later and my belly almost touches it, I’m saddened. When I am sitting in a doctor’s waiting room chair, and I look around at everyone else and see someone who hangs over each side, I catch myself feeling each side of the chair to see how far I am hanging off.

The realization that you are FAT is a hard one to make. Used to, I would avoid that word. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t like it, but I have come to grips with the fact that not saying the word doesn’t make me any less fat. Not getting on a scale doesn’t keep me from gaining weight. Squeezing my behind in jeans a size too small doesn’t mean that I am truly that size.

Reality. It is necessary to accept reality in order to be honest with yourself and move on to do something about it. I started my journey by creating this blog and the FB page. You may be starting your journey by following mine. Whatever helps you is what you need to do.

As for me, I will keep measuring myself in these crazy ways. One day, my fat won’t hang off a chair, and my hands won’t even be close to touching the walls of my shower. My belly will be a safe distance away from the steering wheel, and there will be no rolls to touch one another. 🙂 When I get to that point, I will keep on going. I want to be healthy. Fit. Not just so/so fit, but seriously fit. I know that giving up my current lifestyle of ease will be hard to adjust to, but I believe I can do it! You can, too!

The Starting Point…

Body mass index chart (Photo credit: IITA Image Library)

I was thinking maybe my starting point wasn’t all that clear, so I want to be sure to make it clear. I’ll just be simple in my explanation. Although, I REALLY hate seeing this in print.

I currently weigh 317 pounds; 58.0 BMI.

When I was trying to find out how much I need to lose, I just divided that number in 1/2. 158.50 pounds is what I was left with. Well, I was curious to see what body mass index (BMI) that would be. The BMI is what health professionals use to determine if you are in a healthy weight range. This is the graphic I posted on my first post. If I lost 1/2 of my weight, my BMI would be 28.9 which is just 1.5 points away from being “obese.” Do you read this the way I do? Even losing 1/2 the weight, I would STILL be considered nearly obese.

According to the National Institute on Health, I need to weigh no more than 136 pounds to be considered “Normal” weight. The BMI for this weight is 24.9. I am sharing all of those numbers with you because as I lose, I will not only be keeping up with weight loss, but also BMI. So I need to lose 181 pounds in order to get there.

Wow. For some reason, after typing those numbers and sitting here looking over them, I don’t feel panic. I actually feel at peace. I don’t know if that’s the calm before the storm, or if I am truly ready for battle. I will own this and say, I AM READY FOR BATTLE! If I had a shot gun in hand right now, this is where it would go CLICK, CLICK!!!!! Bring it on!

I Eat for Existence…

Sure, I eat to exist. We all do, but after seeing a recent photo of what appears to be an Ethiopian woman and a young boy, both literally skin and bones, I realize that I DO NOT EAT FOR EXISTENCE — THEY ARE.

I am SO far from being close to needing to eat for existence that it is crazy. I mean if I really think about it, for my height, I’m guess maybe 90 pounds would be critical zone. I would have to lose 2 1/2 – 90 pound people first before even being in a critical position.

So, maybe I need to adjust this one to: I eat to keep from being hungry. Well…I eat to prevent hunger and not as a result of hunger because most of the time when I eat, I am not hungry…yet.

Hmmm, so what does that mean? I guess someone could say that’s the way we are supposed to eat so the body functions correctly. That’s what I’m going for. 🙂